Guards! Guards! Quotes.

1. "A good bookshop is just a genteel Black Hole that knows how to read."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

2. "If there was anything that depressed him more than his own cynicism, it was that quite often it still wasn't as cynical as real life."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

3. "The three rules of the Librarians of Time and Space are: 1) Silence; 2) Books must be returned no later than the last date shown; and 3) Do not interfere with the nature of causality."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

4. "The reason that clichés become clichés is that they are the hammers and screwdrivers in the toolbox of communication."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

5. "Down there - he said - are people who will follow any dragon, worship any god, ignore any inequity. All out of a kind of humdrum, everyday badness. Not the really high, creative loathsomeness of the great sinners, but a sort of mass-produced darkness of the soul. Sin, you might say, without a trace of originality. They accept evil not because they say yes, but because they don't say no."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

6. "A book has been taken. A book has been taken? You summoned the Watch," Carrot drew himself up proudly, "because someone's taken a book? You think that's worse than murder?" The Librarian gave him the kind of look other people would reserve for people who said things like "What's so bad about genocide?"
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

7. "There are many horrible sights in the multiverse. Somehow, though, to a soul attuned to the subtle rhythms of a library, there are few worse sights than a hole where a book ought to be. Someone had stolen a book."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

8. "They may be called the Palace Guard, the City Guard, or the Patrol. Whatever the name, their purpose in any work of heroic fantasy is identical: it is, round about Chapter Three (or ten minutes into the film) to rush into the room, attack the hero one at a time, and be slaughtered. No one ever asks them if they want to. This book is dedicated to those fine men."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

9. "Never build a dungeon you wouldn't be happy to spend the night in yourself. The world would be a happier place if more people remembered that."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!

10. "They felt, in fact, tremendously bucked-up, which was how Lady Ramkin would almost certainly have put it and which was definitely several letters of the alphabet away from how they normally felt."
- Terry Pratchett, Guards! Guards!